We returned to Iowa this last week to visit my mom and family. Matthew drove up with us, then flew to Texas for a medical conference. I had hoped that we could go and be an encouragement for Mom, as well as take more time to come to grips with Dad's death and the consequential void. However, our trip was hampered by severe illness in our little ones and a few sleep deprived nights.
It's hard to keep a good perspective on life when your children are really sick and you're a thousand miles from home and Daddy isn't there to take the other oar. But the Lord faithfully gives glimpses of his glory. (Yes yes, I've talked about this before.) I'm always on the lookout for glimpses of His work in my life and in the life of our family. When that glory is revealed it sometimes appears as the slightest sliver of gold, only showing up when the light shines upon it in a certain way.
Here's a few of the glimpses I had this last week:
*We were able to meet my newest niece and great-niece! What a blessing to see covenant family grow!
*The Iowa sky! It's big and so so blue!
*Easter egg hunts with cousins on a warm spring day. Rachel was my little spring flower. I dearly love her smile and little happy voice.
*Getting the chance to talk and laugh with my brothers and sisters is always a treat - not to mention side-splitting!
*Seeing my mom as she takes each day trusting that the Lord is laying what is best before her. I am humbled by her love for others in the midst of her own sadness.
*Zeke gets some guy time with other boy cousins. This picture is Zeke with his cousin Jonathan.
*Sleep! Jude is sleeping better now that he is getting more nourishment from formula supplements. While I'm sad that I am not supplying his need, I am so thankful that he is responding well to formula.
In all it was a hard trip: illness, sleeplessness, husbandlessness (is that a word?), and a few other "-lessnesses" that I don't even know about. But the Lord is still with me, even when I think He's a million miles away. He's in the hugs of my mom, the smiles of my children, the arms of my sick daughter when she clings to me for comfort, the great gusts of wind, and the magnificent night sky. He's in the great peals of laughter shared with family and He's at the table where we all gathered round. He's in the sudden tears and the arms of a sister there to give a hug. He's in the voice of Zeke as he joyously calls out, "Nanna! Nanna!" and runs to give his big sister a hug.
God is everywhere, filling every nook and cranny; every hour, minute, and second of the thousand miles between here and Iowa. He is always with me on this road home.
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